Monday, August 14, 2006

The Alchemy of Baby Food

Never before in my life have I been so fixated on feces since having a baby.

When Alastair first came home, Adrian and I did as we were instructed and dutifully counted the number of pee and poop diapers Little A had in order to gauge his food intake. Enough coming out meant enough going in.

Then there were the outfit-ruining-blowouts, as many as two and three a day. Of course the lovely folks at daycare assumed that his runny poops were diarrhea, despite reassurances from the doctor's office that they were just normal breastfed baby poops.

Now that Little A consumes actual solid food, his bowel movements have taken on new and interesting characteristics, namely a stink. Ewwww.

There is a science to feeding a baby and ensuring happy poopies. I am currently a pupil of the science and by no means a master. By happy poopies, I refer to bowel movements that are not:

A. Rock hard turds- quite painful for Little A
B. Crazy-huge, big ol' shits

Preventing A and B requires a subtle hand with the variety of baby foods consumed by Little A. The cereal he eats twice a day contains iron which he needs but what also leads to those troublesome hard poops. Bananas, which he loves, are a constipator; not good either. So light on bananas (We found this out the hard way after feeding him nothing but 'naners for four days straight. There was no poop for about four days either.). Sweet potatoes are rich in fiber, but watch out! Too much of those, and you've got a blowout. With the new and improved solid food poops, those blowouts are far more disgusting that the breastmilk only ones.

Every meal is not only an opportunity to enjoy fun time with my baby as he learns about the exciting world of tastes, but also a chance to meddle in the affairs of his bowels. I've yet to learn the magic formula of foods that will lead to happiness in the Land of Baby BM, but I am bound and determine to uncover it.

Holy Cow.

I just wrote a whole entry on Crap.


1 comment:

ahamos said...

Kind of makes you want to watch Flavor of Love, doesn't it?

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