Monday, August 22, 2005

Overwhelming Influence of Lumpy Can No Longer Be Avoided

Today, I am wearing maternity pants for the first time at work.

I've finally given in to the fact that this creature growing inside me is taking up more space every day and that my old pants are not working anymore. However, I feel like I'm just getting uncontrollably fat in the abdomen area instead of brewing a baby. I've already had to go up two cup sizes in my bra. Yeah, it sounds exciting until I look at all the cute, size S shirts that have been relegated to storage. Guess I shouldn't have thrown out all of my old pre-Operation Skinny Bitch bras either. Sigh.

On a shopping spree this weekend with my mom, I purchased several maternity shirts. Haven't been brave enough to don one of those. Mom says I am in denial. I just don't want to start sporting the tent look until absolutely necessary.

Is it too late to do an exchange for an egg?

September 1: We go into to see if we can find out just who Lumpy is. Then perhaps we can narrow down the field of names over which to argue.

And yes, dammit, I am happy about brewing up a kid to eventually warp and twist. Just not too delighted about this slow and steady transformation from Skinny Bitch to Pregnant Bitch.

I should have been a penguin.

1 comment:

ahamos said...

You could have been a penguin, but I woundn't have been delighted about sitting on Lumpy for several months in the snow.

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