Admittedly, Adrian and I are not huge television watchers. In fact by not having cable, I think we are able to qualify for Junior Amish status. Next Adrian will grow a beard, and I’ll start wearing pilgrim dresses. The transformation will never be complete, however, unless Adrian’s allowed to keep the Mini in lieu of the horse and buggy.
So anyway, we were watching one of the handful of shows we regularly watch (the very excellent Lost) when we saw a promo for the next episode of Alias. Alias is one of those shows like CSI that everyone gets all hot and heavy about, and we just don’t. All it took was one episode of CSI for us to determine that it was tripe, just a formulaic, fictionalized version of all those true crime shows on the Discovery Channel.
I tried to like Alias; really, I did. Especially when Quentin Taratino was a guest star on a few episodes. The fact that Jennifer Garner dressed up in fun costumes on every show (sometimes more than one) also appealed to me. But it’s just cheese. It’s like Mission Impossible with a chick star who is kind of invincible. Plus some of the plot lines are bordering on Passions-like hokey implausibility. I’m waiting for Jennifer Garner and Michael Vortan to get sent to Hell to battle demons by the short guy with stubble who used to be bad but now works with the good guys but may be really still be bad all along.
Pardon the digression.
This ad for the episode which was to follow Lost, promised an intriguing plotline involving vampires. Now, I am a sucker for vampires. Since I was already parked on the couch in front of the idiot box, I thought, “What the hell. I might as well watch it if there’s going to be some exciting vampire action.” This is how TV sucks you in with that “I’m already here. Might as well watch some more.” mentality. Then next thing you know you’ve watched like four hours of back to back Law and Order.
Adrian knew better; he watched maybe 10 minutes of Alias (long enough for us to get a few jabs in at the goofy dialogue) and went upstairs. But I sat it out, hoping for some exciting vampiric goodness.
I should have known. For 40 minutes of my life, I got one Jennifer Garner costume change and plot involving deadly pharmaceutical hallucinogens. The “vampire” was a man hopped up on these drugs. Dammit. I want those 40 minutes back.
Now, I am debating whether or not tonight’s ER episode revolving around Carrie Weaver, a character I dislike more and more with every passing season, is worth an hour of my time. I think I’d rather be making Valentines with the goodies I received from Paper Source yesterday via post.
Life is full of choices.