Rough Week

So, last week was pretty bad. My grandmother died on October 2 from injuries sustained in a car accident. From what I gather, it's likely that she suffered a brain aneurysm which disoriented her and caused her to run a red light. Her car was broadsided by an SUV. This happened Sunday, October 1. After the injuries to her brain where deemed too severe, she was taken off of the ventilator (according to her medical directive) and she passed away shortly after.

I haven't yet really had a good sob or cry or whatever about all this. Maybe I am numb. Maybe my mourning will be slow and drawn out. I think I will be sad about this for a long time. Especially when I start to see something I would have liked to given my grandmother as a gift or think of an activity I would have liked to have done with her. I can't mourn for my grandmother's death, only for this things that might have been. Like I was supposed to go with her and Alastair to the State Fair last week. I had wanted her to finally teach me to crochet.

After much poking and prodding, my family had finally convinced my grandmother to move to Richmond, and she had been living here for only a few weeks when the accident occurred. We were all getting accustomed to having her so close after years of living 6+ hours away. My mom is taking this pretty hard; she had been looking forward to having my grandmother here for a long time. The burden of responsibility has fallen on her shoulders regarding the resolution of my grandmother's estate and effects, and the job will not be a pleasant one.

At least on her last full day of life my grandmother got to spend time with Alastair, playing with him and laying him down for his morning nap. Sadly, he will never remember this, nor her.

My grandmother was a neat lady. She grew up during the Depression, orphaned at twelve-years-old. Her Christian faith was very strong, and I know that she was ready (not in a morbid or suicidal way) for the afterlife. Right now she is reunited with her parents, her siblings, her husband, and her oldest son who all preceded her in death.

I can only hope to live the best life I can in honor of her. To keep her memory alive with my son.